Shopping with Sharkfin...

Okay, So i spent my thursday shopping with Charkfin~ =D

Let's see... I wanted to wake up at 8, but overslept till 9.10 =X, Cause i had to meet someone at southies to sell something (yeah, my "business") lol, only 5 bucks, but still at least getting rid of my stuff in my room. =) Okay, i was 10 mins late, but the lady was like, it's okay, no dramas. so yay, so nice of her x)

Okay, So it was pretty cloudy today and it was even raining o_o""" So i was wearing my cotton trench coat (not the semi-shiny polyester one)... I was walking along the road, & Turning into the alleyway which led to char's house...

And a blue-shirt boy was there smoking... & I'm like, dot dot dot, but walk on anyway... Just looking at him, then looking at my watch, and then walking my way to char's house...

Obviously he was looking at me too, and there was eye contact. inside my head, it's like, omg, so disappointing already, this kid...

guess what, as i was almost walking out of the alleyway (i was wearing my chunky headphones, but one side has broken), i heard his voice calling out "faggot"

I just walked on, cause i'm not a quick witted person who can come up with a good comeback immediately, but now that i'm at home and blogging, i've got this message to say to that kid smoker...

At least I have a more Beautiful Soul than you who hates and discriminates people for who they are, and a person like you who can't love, won't ever deserve to be loved...

Then again, i've got no hard feelings, i don't need critiques in my life, i've got people I Love and who Love me back (At least I hope so anyway =)), so who gives a damn about what HE thinks?

So i was just walking along with my corset belt showing off my waistline and walking the catwalk, HAHAHAHAha... I think i do it so much it actually feels natural already... to walk with one foot in front of the other... walking "normally" just doesn't feel normal... Although it did hurt with my sprained ankle tho, so i guess i couldn't really walk the walk properly either. =/

Okay, so pretty much, rocked up at char's, and she was in the middle of vacuuming the house cause shasha was shedding o_o""" , & yeah, it didn't take too long, we eventually made it to the bus stop, and waited for only 2 ish mins before the bus arrived. it was raining by then. o_o"""

We were just doing our random chit chat, yeah, randomly talking about things, i kinda forgot what we talk about. HAHAHHAHAHA, but if u bring it up, i'm sure my brain wouldn't have forgotten the facts, it just needs to be "activated" somewhat. XD

Oh yeah, so we went to the city, & Char was hungry, so i was like, wanna go to Taka's to eat? cause Taka's is close to the yellow cat bus stop anyway. x) so yepyep, we were eating there, & hmmm... HAhahah, we were having an awkward moment when char bought coke zero thinking it was different... HAHAHAHa I was like, uhhhhh... it's kinda like diet coke, zero sugar? o_o""" HAHAHAhah

Oh yeah, & We saw Allen too. =) (nah, not really, a lookalike) But like the Hairstyle, The Face outline (but not the detials, eg. he had the face shape and maybe nose, but the eyes and mouth were not), even the dressing style was almost like allen. LOL~!~!! Charkfin kept giggling and couldn't get over it. LOL

and we wanted to take a photo of him and not appearing as stalkers, so tried to take a pic outside of taka's but the glass window was reflecting, so couldn't really see. =X

but lol... yeah... then we headed off to harbour town where we had spent the rest of the day looking for Charkfin's new party outfits. she was aiming to buy dresses to go out, and nice heels... we also looked at random shops and i spent like quite a looong time trying to figure out what paints i want. =X

I ended up spending like $30 on paints, and more money on brushes, it's like lol, i can open my own studio now. HAHAHAHAHA So yepyep... & during the middle, my sprained ankle started hurting, so i had to sit down for a while as charkfin was shopping. x)

OH yeah, we went into Betts, & Found OMG SO BEAUTIFULL HIGH BOOTS For Char. AAHAHAHAHAHA Sooo Awesome cause the style is nice & the material is soooo XD PERFECT... and for $48... =O good price too, cause those boots would cost around 100 bucks or so. =/

So hahahah, i was even trying one boot on and wow, i felt taller. XD It's sooooo awesome to be a girl, get to have such awesome fashionable items and accessories to wear =(

So hmmmm, yeah, it was about 3.30 ish when we finally finished shopping and had to go back, i wanted to try icey ice but we ran out of time as char had to go be back by about 4.30. =/ Sooo we pretty much had done good shopping. HAHAHAH well, at least char had, all i bought was acrylic paints. XD

So yepyep, i guess that pretty much sums up the day, came home and yeahhh... sooo tired, i took a nap, and woke up... had meatballs for dinner and it has been ages since my mom last cooked em. so yep, that's good. XD

okay, hmmm... yep sooo... looks like i'm back home and i should continue cleaning up my room... or start getting ready for xmas presents? =/

Until the Next Post,
JoeL Un... x)

A Couple of Firsts and Ave Maria...

Okay, I should be sleeping when i'm gonna be waking up at 8 AM later today, it's 1.40 AM now... but like, today, quite a few things happened... sooo guess i should blog about it...

since i'm quite open about myself already, it's like yepyep. sure why not blog a bit about my personal life... lol...

Okay, Sooo... the plan for wednesday was to meet someone at some pub/club/bar (as if i can tell the difference between the 3 of them, oh there's tavern too, what makes THAT diff too?)

Anyways... Sooo... uhhh... I'll call this person "J" based on initial, we had a few convos, and like J mentioned about meeting on tuesday night, and i was like, uhhh, i'm not sure, gimme the details and let me know...

for some reason on tuesday night, i got a call from J, expecting me to be at some pub/club & I was like, huh? i wasn't even ready to go out, still in the process of cleaning out my room (i spent my tues cleaning out my cupboard, and yeah), so i was like, uhhhh, dot dot dot, dunno how to reject saying, i'm not ready to go out, plus, going to a pub/club? dot dot dot, i've never been to one before, i didn't feel like stepping out in the late evening too. -_-"""

like what would my mom think, seriously. dot dot dot

so we said to meet on wednesday (the next day) at 12 noon for lunch... and like, uhhh.... yeah... okay, so yeah, it was my first time to a pub/club/bar. i reckon it was more like a bar, because of the typical bartendar seatings and counter and stuff... tho it could be a club, because there was an outdoor garden ish, and lotsa space, obviously ppl can dance there. so yeahhh... =/

ANYWAYS, met J, and like, hmmm... sadly, failed my expectations... J smoked too, which was against my criteria, even tho i so clearly stated that they were my No-Nos... hmmm... yeah... but we kissed anyway...

J was like sooo persuasive, and omg, i know, it's like so hypocrite of me, like saying that i would always cut a person off before they go too far, and not want to get any unnecessary feelings hurt, because feelings grown out of one-sided love is really painful (first hand experience)

yet, i had such a hard time saying no, and in the end, kissing in the seats of the pub/club. not that it was busy, it was noon time, so like, uhhh, no, not many ppl would be there, but there was still presence of ppl, and i was like, omg so shy don't dare... dot dot dot. o_o"""

So this day marked the day of a few firsts :
1) first time stepping into a pub/club/bar/tavern (oh wait, maybe cross tavern off, cause i went to burrendah tavern for benita's 18th dinner lol)
2) first time kissing in public... still considered public even tho it's a pub/club where it would be considered "normal"
3) first time kissing someone who smoked in the past hour... (like would've kissed ppl who have smoked some time in their lives, it's like smoking and drugs is an inevitable stage in a person's life here. SERIOUSLY MAN, I LIVED MY WHOLE LIFE WITHOUT GETTING INVOLVED WITH EM, WHY CANT OTHERS?!?!?!?)

uhhh...yeahhh... eventually parted ways, but i still couldn't tell J that i wasn't really into J... it's like, so hard to say, when i think about it... it's like, i've always been turning ppl down on msn or email, cause it was yeah, obviously easier that way, and uhhh... yeah... i would have had all my thoughts in place...

oh yeah, in the mean time, i was trying to turn J "off" by like, acting like so deep and emotional, cause like, it would put anyone you first meet off when you start talking about deep personal stuff and emotions, i was like blabbering about how i never been loved and how my heart is still hooked onto my first one, and bla bla bla... in hopes to turn J into thinking, "omg, whatta sicko emo freak, i'm not gonna get involved with such a pathetic guy" lol, ok, so obviously it failed, cause J and i were kissing anyway. =_="""

hmmm... okay, anyways, so i sorta spent the rest of the day looking around shops and wasting time, cause had to go to IGA for a meeting at 5 PM... yep, new management, the owners are changing. my current boss had owned the place for 30 years ish, so yeah, selling it to 4 ppl, 2 indians, 1 guy, he has asian ish features, but think he was born here or something, no idea, and 1 white guy, who's probably gonna be the one running the place... soo like, hmmm... too many bosses.=_="""

but they're like pretty professional ppl (definitely rich too) who'll know and will be capable of owning IGA, like the 2 indians were sorta boasting about how they had also taken over another supermarket and running it successfully, it's like, lol, how modest of them...

i'd actually would've rather meet a boss who has a friendlier, humane, comfortable, inspirational, motivational, leading nature, than one who'd boast about his credentials and his past achievements... but i guess not everyone's a good talker and communicator, i know, i'm not like that either, so it's not easy being an influential talker... =/ it's a real talent to be born with it, i must say... cause like u can develop it, but a smooth talker, will always be a smooooooth talker...

ANYWAYS, so hmmm, yeah, went back home, and my mom was rubbing my sprain from my ankle, omg, it hurts sooo bad. T_T""" it's like pretty swollen. i can walk, but i shouldn't strain it as it's still healing, yet, i'm walking like as tho i'm normal. so i guess i'm slowing it's healing process. =/

okok... hmmm, fast forward, oh yeah, it was my bro's bday today... bought him a pack of chips, and he was working (dot dot dot), i bought him Red Rock Sweet Chilli & Sour Cream chips, Good Quality indeed. but he left it there, and someone put it back, and like he forgot to bring it home. dot dot dot. -_-"""

okay, fast forward, i just wanted to blog as a reminder to myself about how much i cried tonight... o_o"""

It all started at about 7 ish pm maybe? when i was shuffling sounds around my iPod Touch, I think i'll shorten it to "Mo"... That'll be it's shorter nickname... Cause MaxiMusic & OphieLyrics = M&O... So MO... =) (M&O is also the acronym for my management unit i did last semester called Management and Organisation. dot dot dot)

ANYWAY, So i made Mo shuffle my songs, and i found Beyonce, Deciding to play her latest album, & after skipping Halo & Broken-Hearted Girl, Mo tuned into "Ave Maria", & I couldn't help but wonder how the song sounded...

I kept it on replay...
By the end of the First Play, I was touched...
By the end of the Second Play, My eyes kept blinking...
By the end of the Third Play, Tears started falling...
Eventually, I Love it like the rest of Beyonce's I Am Ballads...

My emotions were pretty much heightened because i was looking through the photos of MW(as from previous blog posts), and like... as i helplessly stared at MW's face, zooming into it and out, analyzing the face and eyes that i would never be able to truly have...

Beyonce's Emotional Voice as she Beautifully Sings "AaaaaaaaaaVe MaaaRRiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiaaaaaaaaa" with such a beautiful melodic vibrato... Perfection... She may not be able to hit notes like Leona or Mariah, but no doubt the passion and emotions can be felt in her voice... She's Definitely no lesser of a Goddess... T_T

So Tears just flowed... and flowed... Hopefully, i've let all or at least most of it out already... Okay, maybe the song has totally no relevance to the emotions i was crying over, but like, it totally set the mood and yeahhh....

There's really nothing else left to say...
It's only the deep personal battle and conflict of emotions inside...
Its inability to let go and to ever truly LOVE...

Yeah, if only MW knew of my tears... i bet MW still wouldn't be moved...
but MW was sooo perfect that maybe i should be thankful for having such a wonderful first one...

But then again, it makes the healing process so hard to get over...

Okay, end here, really nothing else left to say, cause i'm just gonna be swimming in my ocean of emotion...
Can't get over how beautiful Beyonce sings those 2 words... *sighhh*

Until the Next Post,
JoeL Un... T_T

50 mins blogging...

MaxiMusic & OphieLyrics...

Okay, let's just say i slacked all my weekends long. Instead of spending the thursday, friday, sat and sun constructively to study for my monday last exam for the year for management... I slacked it all off and only started studying on sunday midnight ish. heck, i read a few paragraphs at night and only started studying at about 2 am in the morning... o_o"""

Yeah, the time was spent either cleaning up my room, or my computer with files and documents and backups of my previous desktops and my documents because my computer was reformatted several times. & IT feels sooo damn sad to have to choose whether to keep or delete my memories, but i was a bit ruthless so i've decided to delete most of them...

goodbye to my days when i was sooo into anime, that my forum that i was really qutie dedicated to back in those days, when we were trying to start the forum's fansub group, and i still had all those memories and files, and remembering how i was spending time and effort trying to recognise japanese hiragana and katakana, and how to use subtitling programmes such as aegisub and subtitle workshop... aaahhhh....

they were such distant memories, miss those guys, dunno what happened with their lives now for the most of them. =(

Anyways~~~ Yeah, so it was time to say goodbye, & so bye bye to those memories, those were fun times, but they take up space in my comp when i don't need em...

Okay, Sooo yepyep, and also sorting out my itunes as mentioned in the previous post... finally feel ready to delete some songs that i really dont listen to, but hmmm... sometimes i just untick them... =/

And the rest of the time was spent facebooking with restaurant city, and i started cafe world. lol, dot dot dot. -_-""" I was working on fri night too and sunday, so yay, i look forward to my weekly hundred bucks as always.. x)

It was a surprise to see nelson, Hahahah, he said he was off to curtin uni to catch up on his unit, lol, good luck for him, it was only last week when i was so determined to go to uwa and sleepover catching up on my law lectures. lol

Okok, so hmmm, yepyep, i finally felt guilty at about 1 ish 2 am, and started studying. i wanted to have a 30 min nap, but i ended up oversleeping to one hour, cause it was sooo cold, i couldn't leave my blanket, and my leg went numb, <_<""" dot dot dot, so lol, my alarm kept ringing but i really couldn't be bothered turning it off >_<"""

My mom was nice enough to send me to the murdoch station at 7.30 ish am, i was like still rushing to read the lectures on my computer, since like some examinable stuff are NOT in the textbook and only on the lecture slides, so was quickly looking at em. =/

yepyep, so rushing to the very last minute, i sorta went 5 ish mins over time too. lol, my mom had to call me, otherwise i would've dragged another 5-10 mins, which means she would be late to work. =X

Okok, sooo i went to uni, and lol, it was the morning rush, and my mind went off again into dream-lalaland, because when there's quite a large number of people at the train station, my eye's bound to drift off to someone who caught my eye. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH still wishing and dreaming... sigghhhh.... *look away*

Okok, so to the exam, i had like 1 hour to spare, saw my tutorial mate, and just sat next to him as we were cramming last minute, he was finishing off his studying, whereas i still had HALF THE SEMESTER TO COVER!!! OMG, i was seriously panicking. lol, i could only study the first half on that early monday morning, and sooo hard to cram the details into my brain... =/

the exam tho, was fairly challenging. there were definitely trick questions that really got me off guard, but i was like, whatever, i don't have time for you... and i went off to doing the short answer questions, which was pretty long, like writing an essay. seriously, anyways, i wrote whatever i could, just like with all my exams. i just felt that it wasn't enough tho, seriously. like, i dunno what else it was that i could've wrote, but it just didn't feel like there was enough substance...

but oh well, i just did what i could, hoping i could scrape a HD, because i was sitting on a 75ish% for this unit, it would be nice, but if i don't get it, i wouldn't have deserved it anyway, so yeah. give up and goodbye...

I came home, i was too tired... omg, while waiting for the 99 bus home, omg, 3 aboriginal guys came along. and they were trying to figure out which bus to take. like they were very scruffy ish ppl. and like, one of them was saying, so? does that bus go to wellington station? & the other one replied, you come over and check, i can't read.

& I was like, omg, i kinda never met a person who can't read... i know they exist in the world, the illiterate ppl in movies are a reflection of the real world, but like, never actually known any grown adult first hand who can't read... =/

And fine, whatever, so they came to sit down at the stop, and started smoking, all three of them, just smoking. seriously, don't they know that they can't smoke on transperth property.... NOT EVEN AT THE BUS STOPS!!! Unless you actually step out of the station, roadway and pavements etc. out of the coloured bricks, yeah, do whatever you want there... but ugh, i was sitting down on the bench, and like, can't stand cigarette smoke, move away, them ignorant blokes don't care, and they were like trying to squeeze themselves onto the bench anyway...

ugh, men with no class nor sophistication, hairy all over and smoking, grossest species on earth... next to hatred for cockroaches and rats... =_=

So i eventually arrived home, & I was soooo Happy when i saw packages for me~! XD HAHahaha... It's like There were THREE Packages, & I was like, OMG, I don't even remember what i bought. LOL~!~!~!!~~!

YES~!~! My IPOD TOUCH CAME!~!~!~ I was frauded of that $330 one i bought, but my money can be claimed back, finally, and so, gotta wait a couple of days before the money will transfer to my paypal account, BUT, I had bought another one for $USD380, which is fairly decent price, still cheaper than US RRP of $399, and the price i paid included shipping. (otherwise it would be $USD350)

hmmm Yeah... so not bad, I was like OMG HALLELUJAH~!

& Showing off to my bro my purchase~! XD SOOO Pictures of Me Opening my BabY~ =D

The boxes that it came in:


Opening the Clear Plastic Case:

and then attaching the Screen Protectors, which i bought a mirror screen protector. & It's like OMG IT WORKS~! SO SPECIAL~! XD

Random:

"Designed by Apple in California" & the earphones soooo neatly packed =O

& THUS, My BABY~!

HAhaha, Yeah, Just showing off the mirror Screen Protector. So COOL~! XD

I'm Calling it "MaxiMusic & Ophielyrics", I would've engrave that onto the ipod, but since i bought it on ebay, there's no engraving method... =/

BUT ANYWAYS, Yeah... It's pretty much copying from the movie "Music & Lyrics" which starred Hugh Grant & Drew Barrymore, but i just incorporated my Fictional Characters's names... Maximillion & Ophelia... Hahaha. I was like, Heyyyy... So Perfect~! XD Cause the MaxiM(the m connects to music) and Ophie's "lia" connects to "lyrics"

Hahahah.... XD

Okok, so was spending the arvo taking and editing the pics, & syncing and registering my ipod touch on my comp XD YAy~ My Baby~!

i just feel so sad for the screen cause my fingerprint's all over it, and i dunno how to clean it off... its like, i wipe it with the cleaning cloth for my glasses, and the oil sorta spreads around smoothly instead o_o"""

ANYWAYS~! Oh yeah, just a random note by the side... Cause being the fussy person i am who wants to collect whole albums of artists even tho i only like one or two of their songs out of the whole album, i download them anyway... <_<"""

& Sooo i was downloading like 4 or 5 of Mariah Carey's Albums, which she has like 10 or something released. & yeah, pretty much listening to all her old songs that she sung, all the pop and ballads before she became the r&b chick that she is now. I really don't mind it at all, cause she's good at singing her stuff. =)

So like... LoL, I've noticed a couple of songs, & I was following the lyrics and like, omg, why is it that Mariah singing the stuff that i'm going through as well??? O_O"""

Did she go through a similar stage of lovelife and heartaches that i am going through right now?

Mainly her song "Just to Hold You Once Again".... Personally, i feel that many of her old songs... either they're too classic for my tastes, but i don't enjoy it... =/

Yeah, she sang some amazing ones like Hero, and Without You (AKA Ken Lee), but i'm surprised how a song like "My All" became a number 1 cause i didn't enjoy it...

Anyways, So in that song, just commenting it's not really an addictive song i'd listen to over and over again, but the lyrics just hit me hard... o_o

It's so hard
To believe
I don't have you right beside me
As I long to touch you
But you're out of my reach

And my heart doesn't feel
It's so very cold inside me
Just a shadow of someone that I used to be

Even though you're not my lover
Even though you're not my friend
I would give my all
To have you here
Just to hold you once again

You were the only one (only one)
That I allowed inside my heart
Now I'm just holding on
To something so far gone
Where did I go wrong

The strange coincidence is that The One that I feel this way for, that person's first letter starts with M, like Mariah, so like, wow, okay. Well, Anyways, just blabbering on about my pathetic love life that wasn't meant to be...

It's pretty much like how this song's lyrics say it... she sang a couple of songs that are so similar to this song's storyline. eg. My All is sorta based on loving someone that she does not have... =/

So yeah... M wasn't my lover, we won't even be considered friends either... yet, yes, maybe M wasn't the only one i let inside my heart, but definitely M was the only one who showed me how wonderful it felt to be loved... and with that, it's no doubt that my heart would fall into such a deep dark hole of obsession and longing for the next time i could have a taste of M once again...

Yet, I know i have to move on... I know we weren't really meant to be together anyway... I guess i'm only stuck here the way i am right now, is because i haven't found someone that i really like, and returns the love... only M was thaaaat amazing, everyone else either didn't return my love, or liked me when they're not my type.

I really need to feel that Magic & Spark that that Person is Special. Sure it might develop in time, but in a world like this where everyone's constantly moving on and changing, it seems almost impossible...

So Anyways, it all comes down to... everything that I've Decided already... constantly praying to the ppl up above for the True One, and i'll only consider giving my life when i can feel so happy living and loving... I'm sure They'd Understand, cause I am After All, Who I Am...

Okay, So yepyep, Now that my exams are over. Goals for the holidays:
1) Clean up my room
2) Clean up my computer
3) Make Erica's Bday Present & Make it as Beautiful as she is x)
4) Develop any talents that i may have?
5) Make Wonderful Christmas Presents for peoples i love =)

and whatever else that life will bring along, But i MUST Make a vow to myself NOT To Waste myself away doing nothing at home >_<"""

Okay, Until the Next Post,
JoeL Un... x)

lol, i reckon i took an hour ++, maybe 2 blogging. =/

Oh yeah, & the other 2 packages out of the 3 i received are a satin top hat, and lace jabots and cuffs, which look awesome and i might wear em to fancy medieval dress up parties or maybe even in public =D

Studying for 3 Exams in a Row...

Okay, so I'm like 75% done with my Exams, & My Final Exam is Last Monday, I've got time to relax... & Blog about how my studying went... LOL

Okok, So Saturday, I didn't Feel like doing anything at all, But i still forced myself to watch 2 lectures, Out of 11 unwatched Lectures for my unit of "Introduction to Law". & YEahhhhh... I didn't work on Sunday morning, Supposedly my bro was like 30 mins late. LOL

***Oh yeah, forgot to mention... Okay, So dunno why that saturday night, I just felt in a good mood, maybe cause i had a nap or something? who knows. But Sooo. I was la-dee-dah Skipping Around the house (i don't do it very frequently, maybe cause i'm not always happy. LOL)

& I probably Skipped a bit too High, & I Think I Knew that I Skipped a bit too high as well, But What I Didn't Expect was that My Landing would be sooo Painful... o_o"""

When i landed, My Toes didn't land on the ground for some reason, & foot went sideways and thus, Spraining my Ankle pretty badly...

It was sooooo bad that I was lying on the floor for 30 mins or so... nah, maybe it wasn't thaaaaat bad, It was kinda cause i went emo after all that physical pain... It's like, After the Loud Krak& Super Stretching of my Ankle muscle whatever it is (my dad warned me to always warm up, cause some of the ppl's tendon or something have slipped off/broken, and it's really painful surgery cause it's underneath the skin, & I was like hoping that i really didn't break anything. Thankfully, It was still okay, i reckon that at that time, i could still walk and everything, so yeahh... it was a bad sprain, pretty bad one too, i don't ever remembering spraining/injuring myself sooo badly before (I take good care of myself mahhhh, Hohohohohooh) so uhhh... yeahhh...)

But then... While i was on the ground, still stunned by what happened, the pain in my left ankle and foot... It's like, My Body had Broken Down, & So had my Soul... All my Negative Thoughts of Self-Pity just flooded my mind... Actually, it was more like, wishing how someone would've been right there, right then, to find me, catch me, and nurse me... along with other thoughts about how pathetic i am, but i've talked about it enough already, so there's no need to repeat myself. =/

Eventually, after 30 mins or so, finally concluded, no one's gonna be saving me. LOL, So i eventually forced myself to get up... and hmmm, it wasn't thaaaat bad... =/ i had expected worse... i began googling on how to heal sprains as fast as possible... as best as possible. =/ & The main method people talked about is RICE. Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation...

I looked at it, and was like, nah, cbb, too dunno how to do it. & many ppl commented that it didn't work for them anyway. it still took 2 weeks or something to heal. =/ So i was like. When i told my bro about RICE, i was like, I saw the first step : Rest, So i decided to go to Sleep. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH so dot dot dot, nah, not really, but yeah XD

ANYWAYS, uhhh, So that morning, i was slacking at first, facebook and ebay and everything, until in the arvo, when i felt like lectopia-ing... That's when i realised, OMG THE NET WAS SHAPED?!?!?!!? WHAT TO DO!?~!?@~!?~?!

I Decided that there was no other way, but to sleep over at UWA. So i was pretty much packing my dinner, toothbrush, planning to spend the overnight at the Maths Computer Lab which is supposed to be 24/7 access... and I was asking people whether they would like to join me, because oh yeah, by sunday, It was hurting really bad, that ankle of mine...

I was pretty much like limping, or had to skip on one foot to walk faster, because i couldn't really put any pressure on my left foot, as the ankle would hurt really badly if any of my body weight was placed on it (and that's what you do when you're walking). sooo yeahhh.h.. I was imagining if i had to walk all the way to UWA limping, or walking veeeerrryyyy slowly, omg, that would be very embarrassing, i would need moral and physical support. >_<"""

but nobody wanted to go with me, i don't blame em, i wouldn't wanna go to uwa on a sunday either with stupid sunday public transport, Sooo lol, My bro eventually came back from work, & I told him about it, he said to ask my friends, if they have good connection. I asked but lol, in the end, my bro decided just increase our broadband quota. LOL. soooo, he asked my mom, pay extra 10 bucks per month, okay? our 10,20 gb increased to 22, 30 i think? like omg, pretty good deal. =/

So Anyways... yepyep, increased our quota, & Then I could start lectopia-ing... Yepyep, by that time it was probs 4 ish pm, when i started on those 9 lectures... The aim was catch up on the lectures, and cause it was mainly about the Trade Practices Act, which all the provisions are in a "package" that we are allowed to bring into the exam, (as long as no notes written), So yehhhh. I was pretty much highlighting everything important...

I was pretty sure of those stuff. I had like a 3 hour nap at night, and then tired in the morning, another 3-4 hour nap in the morning of 5 am to 8 ish... & Then yep, back to work, catching up on the FIRST 8 or 9 weeks of uni... THAT was really hard, cause had to remember so many case names, and my brain really had no space for that. =_="""

BUT ANYways, I just went to uni, & hmmm, tried to read up on more stuff, getting as much stuff into my head as possible right outside the exam room. i reckon the exam was pretty hard, i was actually taking my sweet time writing stuff, that i still didn't have enough time, i was really running out of time, and i had no idea for most of the mcq questions...

in the end, i reckon it was a pretty difficult exam, but i did ALL that i could, i reckon if i had more time, i would only have blabbered on, and wouldn't really be able to "earn" any extra marks that would significantly change my grade, so yeah... i did all that i could, which wasn't a lot really... cause i just like, i don't have the material in my head in the first place to answer the qns... sad. =/

but meh, it was over and i really didn't wanna care about it...

& When i went home, it was time for macroeconomics, i wonder if i had took a nap or something, but either way, i caught up on 5 or 6 recorded tutorials. i was trying to get the stuff into my head, i was sorta running out of time, cause i slept an hour too long, sorta thought i needed that extra hour? (oh yeah, during like midnight ish, i was buying my Ipod touch, LOL, the one i paid 330 bucks for was a fraud, so i'm still in the middle of claiming my money back, i managed to win an auction, paying 350USD for it, plus 30USD for postage, overall adding up to 380 USD, which is still cheaper than US RRP of 399. Not bad,i was happy...)

but what i was pissed about was that the australian exchange rate had dropped from nudging 93 cents to back to 90 cents. and i could've saved like 10 ish bucks from that. Noooooooooooooooo... but sigh, oh well, can only tell myself, what's another 10 bucks, right?, it was also a pretty close win, i put in $350, and the previous person actually put a bid of $349.99. & I was like, dot dot dot, lol, i won by 1 cent? LOL close win. XD)

so back to econs, i was like trying to cram on the bus train bus, and when i reached the exam venue, there was still 30 mins, i was like, i can't study anymore, so i was relaxing, and watching the scenery. LoL, just wasting time... but like, some of the main points of certain chapters that were examined in this exam, i was like, omg, i did not study or bother remembering a damn thing about that topic, so i was like, omg, pretty damn screwed. It was another hard exam, but seriously, can only do all that i could. So i did my best, which wasn't really much. again...

I really Wanted to do My Best, I was actually sitting on a HD for my Law, cause i got 18/20 for participation mark in tutorials. HAHAHAHAHAHA Hhohohoohohohho thanks to ishan for giving me answers to the tutes weekly, so i could contribute. =X

But after that, I reckon... nahhhh... I WISH I could get a HD, but i won't deserve it, and to calm myself down and appease my competitive soul, at the end of my life, i probably won't give a damn about these grades, so just give up and stop caring so much about it. take life as it is... soooo...yeahhhh.... stop being so competitive when you don't even study, so you don't deserve it, pathetic joel. =/

okok, So after my macro exam, oh yeah, i saw fiona and peter and andrew wai? yeah, and lol, they gave me a ride back home. How Nice. XD they all just had an exam as well, lol... the jam was sorta bad, but i got home safely and I pretty much caught up on my sleep. I didn't study at all, until the next morning at 6 am. Actually, it was kinda cause i downloaded itunes on my comp, and was spending the night sorting out my albums...

Being the fussy picky particular person that i am, I was like in a dilemma. I usually download songs by albums. But like, Most of us don't really listen to a WHOLE Album because we don't necessarily love all the songs...

So i know that i don't listen to some of the songs... But if i deleted them, Then they're not complete albums? =( Feel sooo sadd.... T_T Then DO WHAT??? IF i keep songs i don't listen to in my itunes, they'd be wasting space in my ipod touch anyway??? Right? sooo. like, so dilemma. HAHAHHA Any Ideas how to please such a fussy person like me? XD

okay, soooo, i kinda didn't study at all until the next morning, i slept in until like 7 or 8, actually, i kept snoozing my alarm until 8.30-9... pretty bad, cause i would only have like 2-3 hours to study (As i have to leave my house at 12 ish noon to catch the bus train bus to uwa, which takes 1 ish hours, and rather be early than late)

I was seriously cramming, and trying to get into my brain all the other random chapters, before i had to leave the house for the bus. The 2 most major important chapters of the unit was about Variances, (between actual and budgeted figures), so like, omg, it was pretty hard to get those into my head, I was cramming those up until the last 5 mins when the exam venue was opened and ppl were walking into the venue...

I still didn't manage to fully understand it unfortunately, thus, i couldn't answer a couple of those kinda questions, like, i put whatever answer my calculator came up with, but i'm really doubtful that they're correct, cause they're probably not. =(

Yeah, so it's like, i just did what i could really, i dunno whether i did it right (of course, don't we all hope we do the qns right?). So yepyep, just glad that it's over, and we'll see what the marks that come out are...

in a way, yes, i'm glad to be smart as everyone thinks of me, so i'm never worried of failing. =/ But of course, That's ONLY PROVIDED If I actually did work... There's no way (okay maybe Jst very little chance) I'll Pass if i DID NOT DO A SINGLE BIT OF STUDYING For my Exam. I still deserve my marks because i Still put quite a large effort into studying before the exam (just that i didn't study over a long period of time)

okok, So now that my 3 exams in a row are over, I was resting. & My final exam will be next monday... got time to study, i probably should study tmrw, but i might slack. no, i must study. O_O"""

But it'll probs be like my study break which just breeezed by me. unfortunately. Let's hope i don't repeat that again. LOL

Anyways. okok... so uhhhhh. That Explains how my studying had progressed. XD

Phew, It's sooo hot today, & The flies are getting reaaaallllyyyy daaaaaayyyymmmmmm Annoying. It's not even summer yet, but i know that they'll get bigger, fatter, faster and much more annoying. o_o

I need to clean up my room cause cockroaches are coming alive, and invading my room. T_T""" NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~!~!~! so Damn annoying. T_T

& I'll need to clean up my computer. I should save up and buy a big harddrive, & Make room, and sort out, organising my computer files. Everything's just in a mess. sooo yeah... I need to sort out my life... =/

That'll take a long time to do... But OH Well, My Wish for these holidays is to be able to spend Each day doing Something Worth Mentioning/Blogging about. So they're not wasted in idleness, and nothingness... =/

Chances are, as a lazy human being i am, holidays would be wasted, but yeah, I keep hoping, don't i. =/

Hope for all the best~

**Omg, just as i was typing that, I saw a normal decently large cockroach (like i'm sure in this world, there would be even even more humongous ones, so this is decent normal average adult), OMG IT WAS SOOO GROSS AND EWWWWWWWWWWW~!~@! T_T"""

But my Fear turned into Anger & Thirst for Revenge, And soooo... I grabbed it with my hands using a plastic bag as my glove (no way i'd ever touch a cockroach with my bare hands, totally ew, i cant imagine ppl eating these things on whatzthattvshowcalledagain? fearfactor? totally ew. T_T

Anyways, I grabbed it, & Took the hammer from my dad's Toolbox. aaaaaaahhhhh... that felt satisfying... >=D How Dare it come into my room, crawling all over my stuff thinking it belonged here. grrrrrrrrrrrr.....

I love butterflies, but maybe i'd probably be scared of it in real life, cause insects CAN be beautiful from a distance, but i'm scared if they crawl all over me. It's strange, i could never fall in love with an insect, even tho i keep trying to practise an open-mind, love anyone/anything for who they are, etc.etc. but insects are what they are, and i can't ever love them. how hypocrite of me. =(

Anyways, Until the Next Post,
JoeL Un... =/

Think i'll catch up on my sleep now. =/

oh yeah, my bro is considering selling the wii, which is like, i know i don't play it, but i feel so sad to sell it. cause like... what if ppl come over and wanna play something? don't have anything to play =(. What if maybe wanna go to someone's house and need extra remotes or something? and don't have anymore...

like true, i know we don't touch the wii anymore, but i feel so sad to sell it... I just can't let it go yet... =/

Any ideas/help/comments? =/

wow? it seemed like i spent 1 hour 25 mins blogging, i didn't think time passed thaaaat fast? o_o""" of course i did waste time killing that cockroach. but wow. time just passed like that? did i really blog thaaat much? that's scary =X

Grim Halloween for the Devil & the Gaga...

Lying on the Cushion...
Hours pass without motion...
For a Soul to come save Him...
Or a Reaper who's dark and grim...

And the Grim Reaper wants to be put out of this misery...
Lonely, Waiting in the Dark where No One Feels Sorry...

Do I hear sounds?
Footsteps?

This was the rhyme i was writing, from 8.10 PM up until about 8.30 PM as i was writing the last 2 sentences, and that's when the heavenly knocks on my door came, & My Sources of Happiness Finally Arrived ;)

Apparently, Charkfin had soooo much trouble with trying to do her Lady Gaga Look that she asked Cheryl for help, & They still took another 1.5 hours to do =O

Well, Whatever it was, LOL, I was going to be all pissy about them being late, but Hahahaha, Nah, Any Anger or Sadness just Disappeared when I saw the both of them all Dressed Up Fabulously~ HAHahah

It was a sorta depressing day, but won't dwell on that, because Charlene & Cheryl Totally Made My Night~ <3

We Had our Fun, Just chit-chatting and laughing about random things, eating sugar and chips, & Taking Random Photos, & Doing the Can-Can Dance. XD

So much for a 10 hour party with 20 people, I'm happy enough with a 3 hour party with the 3 of us~ =D

Photos are all over Facebook but I'll just post one here just for the sake of it XD



We sorta decided to end at about 10.45-11 ish, since the both of them had early starts the next day, so okay~ Yepyep, They made the Effort of my Decorating & Cleaning up my house feel oooohhhh sooooooooooo Worth it~ <3 It would be nice if more ppl could come over, but oh well~

After last night, I can finally feel like studying... x)

Tho the whole saturday, i kinda didn't do anything... i was editing and uploading the photos onto FB. HAhaha... Though i DID listen to 2 lectures out of the 11 lectures (1 hour each) that i am behind for my Law unit... so screwed for that, but i'm hoping i will do well anyway, relying on whatever genius genes i have...

Oh well, short post, since there's nothing to say about the week, other than i just wasted it, constantly checking the mailbox to see what i received, and i was happy on monday when i received like 5 parcels at the same time, HAhahah... XD

& I caught up on all my Macroeconomics Lectures, but not the tutorials, which there are 6 x 1 hour each... sooo yeahhh... that's my tuesday exam... =X

Just hoping for all the best. x)
God & Jesus Bless Me? =3
Nah, if they don't give me good marks, i'll understand, i didn't deserve them in the first place. HAHAHahahahah... but at least, Once again, Much Love goes out to Char & Cher for Making the Night Wonderful~ <3

Until the Next Post, Probably after my triple exams in a row,
JoeL Un... =)

Frustration, Jolts, Itchiness & a Thumb...

I wonder if all the internal emotional pain finally kicked in and made me feel sick and weak physically. LOL

nah, anyway, nothing much to say in summary of my last week of Uni for First year... with commerce, and skipping out all my lectures, thus attending only 2 days of uni, 3 hours a week of tutorials. =/ hmmm... i don't really talk to people. =/

I got back my essay, which i got a pretty good result of 84%, That was my management essay a couple of weeks back about team development, and that makes up for my semi-below standard previous essay of like 65+ %... so my overall mark for this unit is like 75% not bad...

Overall, For my 4 units this sem, I'm sitting on a strong HD for Management accounting (sadly, i'm not the top lol, since i bet it's the comm/law students who were the ones who got 98% for the mid sem exam, 3 ppl got 98, whereas i got 90 or something, it's a good mark, i admit, but when my competitive spirit sees it, hahahah, it's never good enough until i'm the best, and shining up there XD) but of course, in reality, i didn't put enuf effort in the first place, so i'm in no place to have such wishful thinking be granted in reality. =/

Oh yeah, and i'm sitting on fair D's for my other 3 units... Macro economics with a 68 ish (a Credit), where hopefully i can scrape a D in the final exam, and my introductory law unit... i got a 78% for my assignment, but i wonder how good would my tutorial participation mark be, but knowing how far behind in lectures i am, and how there is just tooo much to memorise and learn for this unit, i'm really doomed for this unit otherwise, just hoping to scrape a D...

I could get a good mark for the assignment, cause you could easily refer to the all the case names in the textbook or on the internet, but in the exams, where you're not allowed to bring in anything, there is jst too much to remember, all the concepts and blabla... seriously, so screwed...

and that management unit,so i'm sitting on a fair D for that... I was hoping to be able to get More HD's than D's, because like i think you graduate with whatever level, so if you get 50% or more of HDs, Ds, Cs, or Ps... well, yeah, you're recognised for that... so i was really really really hoping to get more than 50% of HD's AT LEAST... =/

BUT ANYWAYS... the week passed pretty quickly in my opinion, or maybe i was wasting it playing restaurant city. LOL. no comments... =X

Oh yeah, over the whole week, i was constantly checking my mail box for my online shopping stuff to arrive... Finally, my fingerless gloves arrived~! XD Took 3 weeks, damn,that's almost a month, and so are all my other items. >=(

I was also expecting my ipod touch to arrive, but it never came, and i emailed the person, hoping it wasn't a fraud seller and all, thankfully he/she replied and said that the supplier from Cairns sent the wrong items, and they'll let me know when they post it out... so like, dot dot dot, fine, at least it wasn't a fake transaction, 330 bucks isn't nothing... =_=... i can't wait for it to arrive in my mail box... =/

a couple more other things i'm expecting... i must have some sorta fetish with leather, but lol, i ordered so much leather stuff... I'm sorta bias-ed by Leona Lewis who's ethical and against clothing made out of animals, but hmmm, i at least hope the stuff i bought are made out of fake leather, that's why they're so cheap anyway... ? lol

Okay, so i'm waiting on screen protectors, my ipod touch, leather corset (an actual corset as opposed to the belt), the ruffle shirt (i finally bought it. lol, so much for no more spending. =X), leather fedora hat (HAHAHAHA, a fedora's been on my wishlist for quite a long time XD), hmmm... yeah... =/

there's still a lot of stuff i wanna buy, especially cheap party decorations from the UK which i could resell here at a Fair affordable price if i bought in bulk (that's like 300 pounds so 500-600 AUD.. omg, i'd be like investing in a business, lol)

I managed to sell my satin top hat, for 35 bucks, Yay~ LoL, (shhh, i made about 8 bucks profit from there HAHAHA) but i actually wanted to buy an EVEN TALLER Top hat for 40 bucks, that's why... but the seller on ebay stopped selling it like a month ago, and yeah, the fact that i only sold it this week. saddd... i hope a tall top hat will come along... it's like there's a major difference between a 12 cm tall top hat and a 17 or (was it 20) cm tall top hat, i was like, omg... must have. hAHAHa & IT MUST be SATIN Material, cause Satin shines =O Unlike Felt or etc... velvet isn't tooo bad but it's still eww to the touch if it's on a hat... =/

Satin is a soft and shiny material~ <3
but such wonderful materials get damaged easily sadly =(

yeah, it's because of my online shopping, now i actually know the difference between SOME fabric materials. HAHAHAHA, satin, velvet, felt or feltex, cotton, polyester... i don't know how does silk actually feel like tho, what makes it stand out from those other mentioned materials. =/

Hmmm... Thursday, i didn't get to ask ishan for help for my final law tutorial, so i just went in there and like, hopefully participated a bit. lol... anyways, i stayed back and omg, it was so cold and windy that night, i think i was chilled, but thankfully, i didn't fall sick... =X

Oh yeah, that's cause i went to Cockburn's big W to buy M&Ms, Omg the deal is sooo good~! 900 grams for 9 bucks, which is 1 to 1 ratio, like, WOW, and even on special, u see places selling them for less than the 1 to 1 ratio. ie, 380 grams for 5 bucks, paying more for less sorta thing... so like, cheapo me. HAHAHAH

And hmmm... yeah. oh, on friday, i went to a dental appointment, and i had to take the HOURLY ON A WEEKDAY 516 bus from Southlands, it's like, omg, my appointment was at 12, but the bus is hourly at the 10th minute. dot dot dot. so uhhh... lol, but the driver took a wrong turn, and i was like, omg, how far do i have to walk cause we never seemed to stop... o_o

then the other passengers told her that she was driving the wrong route. LOL, so turned around, and yepyep, found our way back, lol, it was about 11.30 by then. and like, yeah... i was still early for my appointment. =/

fast forward, my mom as agreed, met me at the place and then she bought lunch and brought me home to eat it. yepyep, then i had to go off to work, i was pretty pissed off at one of the girls there... lol, hope she doesn't ever read this blog. lol... not that i'm thaaat close with her anyway... too extremely diff social group

so she was like, busy have to stack up stuff on the shelves and everything, and omg, friday night is seriously bad, the queue was just really long, and she was constantly MIA... so like, sigghhhh... feel so frustrated at the lack of teamwork and can feel the pressure and customer's frustration...

then at the end of the night, she said she had to count my till, and i'm just like, BUT I USED UP ALL MY COINS, (i was already tired from the night, okay? i was too lazy to count all the stupid coins, which i used up all of mine, so nothing to count)

but nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. biatchy her just like, as tho, totally no care or sympathy, shrugged me off, and just did whatever like she's some biatch boss from hell... like, fine, i accept that she has more experience than me, but we're all in an exchange relationship, i'm considerate for you, could you be considerate for me? did u realise how busy and crazy it was that night? and that you weren't there half the time cause we understood that there was a lot of stuff to stock back in the shelves... (but that meant we had to handle more customers among less counters)... so grrrrrrrrrr....

when my bro asked me why she was counting my till (so i had to move to the other till, next to my bro, which was supposed to be HERS, and was full of coins), and i sorta exploded there, and now that i think about it, like, wow, that's embarrassing cause i exploded and probably sounded like a real biatch too, IN FRONT of the customers... o_o""" but really tho, that was all the frustration that built up...

meh, i was really frustrated from that night, but my bro was still the main one who was sick of working. no comments, if everyday was like that, i'd be sick of working too...

actually, that girl also got on my nerves waaaaayyyyy before the night, it just really climaxed at that point... it's like, she was constantly talking over the customers i was serving, telling me stuff to do...

I'm just like, omg, can u not see i'm serving customers? i like to actually TALK and TREAT my Customers, Make them Feel like i'm paying ATTENTION to THEM? and she was talking to me, telling me to do etc.etc. (which it just breezed thru me, cause i can't multi-task)...

& When i desperately needed to go to toilet, all i needed was 2 minutes. I knew it was ONLY 2 Minutes, GEes I was only gonna chuck a piss, Not like i had a MAJOR Stomachache and Diarrhoea or whatever... Sheesh, she was giving me a lecture ish about how i should've gotten someone to replace me while i went away...

Seriously, a girl like her wouldn't understand, I betcha i really did take only 2 minutes or less, and she was still like lecturing me ish, about the need to get a replacement. Cause seriously, i betcha it would take me TWO MINUTES ALREADY Just to walk into the aisles to ask someone to replace me for THOSE TWO MINUTES I WAS AWAY...

like puh-lease. whatev, that was one of the most pissing nights in work, ever... my bro (who was working in replacement of my usual colleague emma,cause she had her architecture folio due that day), said that she was pms-ing. I was like, lol, don so mean lah at that time... but by the end of the night, after my explosion and all (nah, i didn't explode thaaat badly, i've had worse, that was only like 10-15%. =/)

yeah, i guess she probably really was pms-ing and she did a hell (yes, pun intended) good job of pissing me off...

Today, when my mom was wanting to pay me thru her online banking thing, the thing is, she was on the ANZ online banking site, and i was like, i had no idea how to operate it since i'm with bankwest, and it had soooo many options by the side bar compared to bankwest's... and obviously it would take time to find it... & for some reason, my mom called me for help, since she was gonna be paying me, and like, soo i was exploring the options, and she was saying, It's NOT this one, obviously that this one is for bla bla bla, NOT THAT one also, and it's like OMG WHY SO FRUSTRATING ~!~!#~@%!!@$~@~!#~@$~!#

IF YOU KNOW SO MUCH, WHY U ASK ME FOR~@!!~$~!@~ LET ME TAKE MY TIME TO FIGURE IT OUT TOO LAAH~!#~!%~!@# GGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH%~@$~!@~!~#

Eventually, my bro who was by the side the whole time eventually figure out that she hadn't really applied for the access to pay anyone's bank account, so he easily found it and activated it, and done, my mom paid me. fine, he could do it easily... but my mom really got me frustrated and angry there. it's like We're in no rush, why you Getting SO Uptight and all that...

grrr, i came back to my room, and Vented out my anger by slamming my table with my hands... couple of my things toppled... but it's a good thing i never developed muscles, or i would've karate chopped my table into half, and my table bought from ikea wasn't cheap... =/

so meh. and bleh... that was how frustrating my week was... but it was nice when charkfin came after her work and my work on friday night to collect the vest for a superheroes birthday party. =) hahaha, i'm sure they're all having lotsa fun right now. x) Allen also borrowed my cloak. lol... was considering charging him rent. HAHAHAHAHa, but i was like, nah, just dry clean it for me, and that's all i ask for. HAhha... should be nicer and not so money minded to friends right? <_<""" *slaps myself for even thinking about charging rent*

Anyways... Okay, So as the start of this post mentioned, i was pretty weak physically. Throughout the week, I had this headache, it's not like an extremely bad one that i would experience when i have a fever, but it was like, my head was SLIGHTLY (only) heavy, not extremely, but when i shook my head,like turning it around, or was running, my brain and eyes would feel random jolts of pain, like so strange, dunno why, it was more annoying than painful... and that happened throughout the week...

But on Friday night, for some reason at work, i had random itches, i was scratching, but didn't really notice, but after work, i really started scratching more... later in the night, and before showering, i realised i was so itchy all over while facebooking, i was really scratching myself everywhere...

i went to shower, and hopefully wash myself with soap and hope no more itchiness. =/

i was pretty sleepy and tired (after the anger and busy night from work), but i was so frustrated i wasn't hungry when i came home, and finally felt hungry at 12 midnight... so i was like, what can someone eat that is easy and fast to prepare, or just EASY to Eat when they're hungry AND very sleepy to prepare anything too tedious...

bleh. in the end, i cooked myself 2 packs of indo mee. yepyep... that night, i slept in my bed, and i think i might've dozed off for 15 mins or so, cause like, seriously, i just kept scratching myself ALL OVER, (lucky not my face, but like everywhere else, arms, legs, chest, belly, back, neck)

I dunno why, my thoughts were lice, or maybe cockroaches had been crawling all around my bed, so their presence makes my skin itchy... no damn idea, but i went to shower again, and got out of my robe that i usually wear, and wore a clean pair of shirt and pants, and then went to sleep on the couch...

i was hoping that i wouldn't be itchy, after a second thorough shower, but nooooo. i was still itchy, to a lesser extent, but it was still there... all over. Before showering, i looked in the mirror, and i had scratched myself everywhere sooo much that i had really bad red marks ALL OVER, I was like (being the proud vain self i am) OMG SO UGLY!@!~~ NOOOOOOOOOO!!! IT WOULD TAKE WEEKS FOR MY UNHEALTHY BODY TO RECOVER & HEAL THE DAMAGE I HAD DONE TO MY SKIN~!~!@# T_T"""

i was considering calling some emergency nightline for hospital or some gp, lol, but i figured nah, live thru it for one night, and if it's thaaat bad, will visit someone tmrw with my mom. =/

so i went to sleep anyway despite the itchiness and I was later awoken by my mom who was walking around the house in the morning, and i told her about the scratches half-awake, just showing her my arms and back where i was scratching....

and she said she could bring me somewhere but it would take probably an hour wait or something, and i was like, maybe later, i'm still sleeping... lol...

and sooo yeah... i continued sleeping... When i woke up, I looked in the mirror and was like, omg, no more red marks? o_o WOW, Whatta pleasant Surprise~! XD My Skin healed in my Sleep, HooRAY~ XD

like, specific parts where i scratched a bit too much could still be seen, but you'd have to analyse a bit more before you could see it, sooo like, but overall, my skin looked normal. XD Hahahah... so yay~ XD

but i was still itchy from time to time tho... Not as bad as it was that night. =/ My mom suggested maybe it was allergies, but i was like, what? i'm allergic to my room? lol... or i'm maybe i'm allergic to the night cause the itching sorta stopped in the daylight. LOL super strange, the whole day, my mom soaked and washed my pillow cases and bedsheets, so yep yep, just suspecting it's my messy untidy room, so i sorta tidied up a little bit of it. =/ but spent most of the time facebooking and stuff too. so lol...

tonight at church, my bro came up with the idea that the figure and shape of our thumbs depicts our real figure? LOL... he said it so far fitted the 3 of us, my mom, him and me. & I was like, Hohohohohohohohoho with mine ;D Why?

Hohohohohoohohohohohho Hourglass Thumb~ XD
***Actually, i realised how ugly i look in this picture, my teeth, my eyes are so weird, or my glasses maybe... >_<""" lol... at least i've been having a smooth face, none too many dramatic pimples, phew for less stress in uni, tho i still get some annoying ones from time to time. =X

Anyways, i haven't studied AT ALL... i really should start... =X... Good luck to me >_<"""

Banzai for Exam Week & Then Relax forever, Work & then Can SPEND my time Online Shopping or Hanging out with Friends more~! =D

Until the Next Post,
JoeL Un... x)

about 1.5 hours or less blogging. =/

What I Need and Want, My Journey and a Conspiracy...

Okay, so weekends were spent the same, went to church and had kfc for dinner on saturday... work on friday and sunday... friday, my colleague emma and i were like crashing, didn't wanna work at all.couldn't wait for the night to end, even tho i had napped and slacked the whole day. =/

something was gonna happen on sunday evening, but i was glad it didn't go on, the blame was sorta put on me, but meh, in a way, it wasn't really my fault that they made other plans... (sorry if it doesn't make sense, but like it's not something i'd reveal here)

Okay, So Monday, i woke up feeling hardworking... I think the guilt of missing so many lectures finally sunk in, & I decided to catch up on all my Macroeconomics lectures... wow, I think i must've listened to like 5 or 6 lectures today... That's pretty productive if u ask me, and i was still facebooking and playing restaurant city in the meanwhile. LOL!!! Oh & catching up on another hour of my management lecture...

Anyways, mainly, my macroeconomics unit is an introductory unit, but the lecturer Dr. Paul Crompton is like, he blabbers on about real-life events and what is going on in the world right now... Which can be a good and bad thing. Sure a good thing is, u know how macro relates to the world... Bad thing is, u dunno what you need to know for the exams, since all these general/such professionally detailed knowledge are seriously just too much, and yeah, dunno if you need em for the exams...

Sure, i guess he does a good job of getting you interested in the topic, i'll admit, i hate econs, but him talking about how and why this happens (especially a certain conspiracy i'll explain later) is pretty... yea... sorta gets your eyes open.=/

BUT if you're just someone who wants to breeze by and doesn't give any damn about what's going on in the world, and JUST 100% don't CARE... which i would be in this group of ppl, and merely just wanna pass or do well in this unit without worrying about all the unnecessary useless jibber-jabber facts... yeah... u seriously wouldn't care...

but... the main part of this 2nd half of the unit is about international macroeconomics, pretty much spending 3-5 weeks talking about exchange rates, and money flowing between the countries... why countries with low/high savings and investment rates operate the way they do... and what is happening right now... =/

But okay, i won't bore u on my blog. lol. if u wanted to read all that jibber jabber on my blog, u would might as well just do commerce/econs... lol

SO, but my lecturer was explaining how mainly Most of the big developed countries (mainly the USA, but also includes europe and us, Australia and etc.etc. countries around the world), have been borrowing a lot of money and are in debt. =/ & Why are housing prices so inflated and so much spending occuring? because we've been borrowing a lot of money to fuel all this consumption and spending...

Where have we been getting this money from? China... mainly amongst the other countries with high savings rate (because they have high savings, they lend this excess money to foreign countries for interest profits and etc.)

and pretty much, so China has been accumulating a LOT of wealth and money, and been buying a lot of US assets (ie bonds and bla bla financial reserves, whatever the etc. etc. the lecturer was talking about), & well... Of course, not wanting to defame anybody, but it was a real implication that China is up to a conspiracy... =/

By owning More and MORE of US assets, shares bonds and bla bla, pretty much, they're gonna take over the world, and overthrow the US and US dollar... replacing it with the china currency (my lecturer keeps talking about yuan, but then, what is the ren min bi that i often remembered hearing LOL, cause i'm like never given a damn)

So like... i posted on my facebook and twitter "what? macroeconomics is implying that China Chinese wants to overthrow the US??? NOOOOO I don't wanna go to America/Disneyland having to speak chinese?! T_T""""

George replied saying that they had been plotting this for 10 years already?
& i reply "T_T... gees man, like go to hell, don be so power-hungry, grrrrrrrr...=_=.... i know it's too idealistic and unrealistic for EVERYONE to be happy, but like... i wanna live in a happy peaceful world... =(

like, stop being so evil, selfish, self-serving and manipulative... =_= *ugh*"

and this is because china chooses to operate under FIXED exchange rate and purposely limits their capital outflow, so all the money in the world flows into them, and little leaks out... =_=.... (for those ppl who know some economics, we would know that Supply of whatever currency = Demand of that currency, Outflows = Inflows, All the Debits = Credits, They Balance because of the Freely Floating Exchange Rate... NOT double-entry accounting, lol, that's off topic.)

So anyways... Yeahhh... And i go on saying "someone should remind them that life and love isn't a one way street and an exchange relationship must be maintained for true balance and peace... >=("

Cause seriously, man, Why do you wanna be so powerful for? It doesn't matter to me, and i don't care... But it's pissing and annoying if someone wants to forcefully snob their way to the top...

It's like, If it's meant to happen, Let it Happen, Don't be so evil and all, soooo aiming to be at the top and the best or whatever... (i know i get caught up in the competitive spirit and everything) But at the end of the day, At the end of your lives, it doesn't matter whether you're at the top or not, seriously, gees... cause no one cares if you're the top when you're a heartless snob...

eventually, you'll be overthrown anyway, like history has shown all the empires and bla bla that have crumbled... like, i'm just thinking, stop it, u know? do your part in being a noble, respected, giving, caring position, and everyone will at least, hopefully return the favour... what goes around, comes around, after all... =_=

Maybe i'm being really bias-ed here without looking at all the facts, jumping to conclusions without looking and understanding both sides... so i guess i'm just commenting barely on what i know, and uhhh... well, so far, i just don't see the reason why they wanna be so rich for, and own assets of all around the world for...

Cause so far, it all seems like for a very self-serving purpose to be a rich wealthy country... i haven't really bothered collecting a lot of facts, so i guess feel free to tell me that what i'm saying is wrong... but i'm still standing strong on what i believe is to be the "right" thing to do...

everyone has a place in the world, don't overstep your boundaries and crush others along your way. =_= cause if you do, i hope it'll all come around back to you, and you'll see all your efforts crushed like the way you did to others... >=(

it's like, if u're so rich, go spend all that money funding good causes eg. for third world countries, or searching for cures of all the diseases in the world, instead of owning financial assets of the world, please? =_= The world would be much more appreciative of you that way... =/

So okay, i think these are all the opinions of pathetic me... but yeah, pretty much, otherwise, i really wouldn't care nor give a damn until it started affecting my life... Cause all i ever wanted and needed in this life is a stable, fulfilling, meaningful happy one... and i don't want it to be tainted and destroyed by selfish intentions of others. -_-"""

Okay... well, now, whatever with that... at dinner, I asked my mom about the Disney World idea that charkfin had been talking to me about like, it is a whole month now, i think? I just never really found the need or reason to talk about it, since i said i would think about it at the end of next year...

but like, i just figured, sure just ask, & lol, so i told my mom, and she was like, oh sure, go do whatever exchange program you want... LOL, and get all the experience. yeah... hahaha, my mom's really cool with letting go, hahah, i wish i could learn that quality of truly embracing, accepting and being able to let go instead of constantly clinging on... =/ (then again, there's the excuse that she's a pisces, and pisces falls in the group of horoscopes along with Sagittarius, gemini, and virgo who readily and easily adapt to changes lol)

Anyways, So then i told her that you have to be a citizen to join the program, like maybe can be PR and go? but i haven't bothered asking yet. But my mom was like, Oh, want to become citizen then? because she was considering also, but she didn't want to do it by herself, like, paying the 16 bucks fee or something? and then doing the quizzes alone? so like, she said, sure, do it together after my exams. LOL!!!!

so... so far, it looks like i am gonna go to Disney World for a year... =D like yeah, i've got a lot of assets and stuff here... my treasured belongings and everything... friends and people... I really hate having to lose them or even the thought of being apart really almost broke me inside...

But while walking to work on Sunday, I was thinking to myself... like, pretty much what i replied to erica in my cbox. I know that i constantly tell myself that i believed i don't need much. All i ever needed or wanted is that true One... Once i have that true love i have been wishing for, i can do anything. and whatever else i wanna do...

Like, Sure, a good Career, to be Rich, to be the Best/Top in something, to be Respected, Exploring the World & Constantly learning, Absorbing useful knowledge? There's SOOO MANY THINGS That I COULD Do with my life... BUT i Don't GIVE A DAMN about All Those other things at all... All i ever Need & Want is That True Love, The Rest is Secondary, & I'll be able to achieve anything if i can set my mind to it... But my source of motivation and happiness would come from my stable source of love... That True One...

That's what i had always been believing and relying on... But i guess, Fine, Obviously Jesus doesn't want me to find true love so fast... =_=... Coincidentally, the sermon in church on saturday was about... Why we don't get what we ask for, and why we shouldn't get angry at Jesus/God because we don't get what we Want (even tho we say we may need it or etc.) & I'm just like, omg, it hit so close to my heart, and what i replied to lynn in my cbox...

but still, i'm still very damn stubborn on sticking to my i-won't-give-you-my-whole-life-until-you-grant-me-my-miracle-jesus principle. =/ LOL Fine, I will do my part as a noble human being who tries to be nice, friendly caring to others. I will do my part and my best in not hurting or causing pain to others... Of course, i'll still be evil just for fun, and out of friendliness XD, i never meant to cause physical or emotional scars... unless such pain had been similarly inflicted upon me, but usually, hmmm... i'd TRY not to make bad things go around? >_<"""

okayokay, i'm going a bit off topic here. BUT ANYWAYS, so but mainly, Okay, Fine, So Jesus OBVIOUSLY isn't gonna grant me That True One i have always been wishing for. FINE~! WHATEVER~!@ GRRRRRRRRRr =_=

I guess it's just like Miley Cyrus's Song "The Climb" from Hannah Montana the movie... Which is a pretty inspirational country-rock ish ballad, saying that life's not about the end/the result (the mountain), but it's about the journey (or the climb)...

So i guess, FINE, like I was beating myself up ish, saying, Seriously, so far it seems like EVERYONE I have met, okay maybe 98% of the ppl i met (just a rough estimate), they all wanna go party, clubbing, pubbing, they wanna meet all sorts of people, explore the world, enjoy new experiences, and see the wonderful things out there in the big big world...

Sure, That's all fine and dandy, But I KNOW That THOSE are NOT What I WANT... NO... I Do not need those... All i ever wanted was to rust at home with the True One... I don't need or even WANT to get lost in the big wide ocean out there. Cause the world is so big, i know i could swim endlessly and never find myself out there... And anyway, I know i don't need it... I'm not thaaat interested in satisfying that curiosity, cause i just don't need/want to... even tho everyone else wants to...

I don't need to go partying/clubbing/pubbing to "have fun". I can understand it as a phase in like almost everyone's life, where they have those wild and crazy nights before they finally decide to settle down with someone special... but i know that i don't need to waste years of my life on getting myself drunk, to find the true one... it's just in my opinion, a serious waste of time... when i just wanna seriously get down to business and start making my life as fulfilling, and meaningful as possible...

BUT, Now this is where the song "the Climb" Comes in... (lol, i mentioned it too soon), so it's like, FINE, I guess Jesus doesn't wanna grant me that True one yet... & he probably won't give it to me until i become 25 or 30 or something... =_= grrrrrr

Cause i bet he wants me to go through a journey... a real life-changing journey where i will learn more about myself and bla bla... but it's like, i've had enough high school drama, and i've had enough... all the obstacles, heartaches, and challenges. I've studied enough back in high school, and am sick of studying anymore. I'm sick of all these obstacles and troubles and strife. I just too sick of going on...

but sigghhh... no, apparently, it's still not enough, i need to go through more... i guess i really am a spoilt brat... i complain and complain even tho when i know i'm not the worst off... but i'm just so sick of this, u know? I don't want years of my life passing me by, i don't wanna waste my time and my youth... worse still spending them on crazy, wild nights where i wouldn't remember what happened (that is imo, even worse)

But Meh... So, FINE, I concluded to myself, FINE, 1) Jesus isn't gonna give me my True one Yet... 2) I still need to go through more obstacles in life... 3) I need to learn how to be able to Truly Love, since my "love" has always been so restrictive, possessive and jealous... it's obsession, not love. =(

Then i keep telling myself that i need to find someone who can Teach it to me... but my guess is that the majority would be against me, saying that, NO, learn it yourself, you douche, stop being so dependent, expecting everything to be given to you, you damn spoilt brat. learn it urself, seriously... =_= (yeah, my realistic side scolding myself, but i don't use words like douche, hmmm. just felt like the right mood. for a bad word, it doesn't look very bad like the f- word. =/)

So FINE, an attempt to sorta force myself out of my shell, & then exploring the world just a little bit more, Sure, I'll be joining Charkfin in Going to Work in Disney World for a year. At least i'm fairly Certain i wanna do it, cause she, being a real talker, very persuasive in her arguments, (i wish i had her social communication skills, cause i can't talk thaaat smoothly in real life, =/ i blog or talk on msn better, because i have time to think of what to say and write, so i have pretty bad face-to-face social skills =X)

So Anyways... YEah, & Working in Disney World, i guess, Yeah, Sure, It's something i WANT to do... to be involved with Disney. HAHAHAh... XD & so, going to America, Sure, I'll be meeting a lot of different people, and i guess, sure, i'll go through some journey at least... =/ I wonder if i can meet a True one over there... HAHAHAHAHAHAH my imagination just keeps dreaming, but i guess, in a way, it's good to be hopeful and optimistic right? XD

I hope for all the best then... =) It'll still be another 2 years anyway before we actually fly off to USA anyway... =/ for now, i have to worry about those 9 hours of law lectures to catch up on... And my 4 exams too... =_="""

So okay... I think i'll end my blogging here, i've really blogged lotsa stuff close to my heart. so hmmm... yeah, please don't ridicule or laugh at me. =_=
Joel Un... =/

Nevertheless, I'm still hoping to find Something or Someone right here, right now who'd At least bring some sorta SPARK of Life back into me... =/

Whew, it's almost 2 am in the morning, that's like almost 2 hours blogging, tho i did play restaurant city a little bit in the middle. HAHAHAHA XD & playing Glee's Cover of Queen's "Somebody to Love"...

It's a pretty Amazing Cover ( i haven't heard the original song), but it's like really a hopeful happy song which goes "Somebody, Somebody, Can Anyone Find Me Somebody to Love?"

OH Yeah... HAHAha I did a random personality quiz... which measures like your primary and secondary personality ish among 4 types? which are: (and the percentages show how much of each i am)

Builder, 31%: Usually very popular. Deep attachment to home and family. Calm demeanor and low anxiety. Often consistent, loyal and protective.

Explorer, 11%: Known for high energy, high creativity and spontaneity. Seeks novelty, risk and pleasure. Intellectually curious and not easily swayed by opinion.
(LOL, Obviously very low here since i hate taking risks and i'm not curious, but... lol, i got some points here cause i think i'm creative? =/ and do have some spontaneity. lol... not easily swayed by opinion maybe one thing due to my stubbornness, lol, but i'm generally open minded tho)

Negotiator, 37%: Excels at seeing the big picture, long-term planning and consensus building. An intuitive thinker who is flexible, verbal and socially skilled. Imaginative, empathetic and nurturing.

Director, 21%: Daring, original, direct and inventive. A non-conformist. Skilled at abstract thinking and short-term planning. Often assertive and quite competitive. Tough-minded and efficient.

Okay, So It says:

You are a NEGOTIATOR / builder

You care about the big picture. You are comfortable with large, ambiguous issues. You carefully weigh all of the variables involved, and regularly come up with imaginative solutions to complex problems.

You are friendly and humane. You have a big heart; you tend to trust people and sympathize with them easily. You want to make others happy and self-confident. So you work to build supportive networks among friends and kin.

Your empathy and kindness spill over into a desire to make the world a better place. And with your resilience and creativity, your ability to do many things at the same time, and your cleverness with words, you can be remarkably effective at improving the lives of others.

You are ambitious for your family and friends, but not always for yourself. You like an environment of sharing and consensus and you enjoy working in teams and planning long term.

You tend to be socially well-adjusted and skilled at inspiring others to reach their goals. So you are an empathetic and engaging companion.

Hohohohohhohoho... How i Wish this were true. XD HAhahah. Reading this makes my nose go high, and my pride rises... LoL. I'm kinda doubt whether i fit this in reality, but all those mentioned there, is DEFINITELY what i Want to be. LoL... or at least wish to be? HAHAHA

Okay, it's almost 3 am now, i'm tired and should go sleep soon. =X